Do not be afraid

Christmas is proof of the 'already but not yet.' 

Jesus comes among us now but he will come to us again.

Ryan

Manila, Philippines

Memento mori

I do not think I am afraid of death. I am afraid of the life of me that will remain, when or if I pass that is, and the legacy I leave and the words spoken of me freely because I am no more. Did I live well? Was my character kind and honest? Did I love and was I loved? Will be a remembered as a sinner or a saint, or even more honorable to me: both?

So there it is: I fear what people think of me more than my own end. I am not necessarily driven to live more or to live greater in order to leave a better legacy. I have lived a good life. I have traveled. I have read. I have learned. I have seen beautiful things. I have seen sorrow and joy. I have asked hard questions. I have loved someone and I have felt love. I have sought to make my world better, although I haven't always succeeded. I have searched for the kingdom of heaven and I thought I had found it.

Perhaps one thing remains, and that is I have not wrestled with God as Jacob. Do I really want that? Do I seek a true cathartic experience with God? Do I fear leaving bruised and worn, having lost all I love as did Job? Do I really fear death, or do I fear the dying before death, or the living after it?

Ryan

Southern Luzon, Philippines

We try to live in such a way that no man may find fault in us

It is my wish to live in such a way that I do not cause offense to anyone, except in situations of blatant immoral injustice, so that no one may blame God for unkindness. That is all I want -- I want to live simply, quietly I don't want to be recognized or famous. I want to do good in the world and be forgotten except by those whom I love and love me. I used to not care about this: I'd try to live my own way ignoring the sensitivities of others. But as I have become more sensitive to others' unkindness, I now recognize my need to be sensitive to the concerns of others.

Ryan

Manila, Philippines